Twilight

Even though we're three feature films away from the conclusion of the Twilight film series (Eclipse premiers at the end of this month), there's already talk of what the adaptation of Breaking Dawn, the final book in the series that is being broken into two movies, is going to include...or more specifically leave out, namely Bella's bone-breaking, blood-soaked, and almost-lethal delivery of her vampire baby.

 

Sometimes a simple acknowledgment of douchery just isn’t enough. Sometimes you have to step back and marvel at how consistent, how dedicated, how impressively shameless a person’s commitment to being a total asshole is. And that’s why Bitch has decided it’s time to start recognizing those individuals as the All-Star douchebags they are. Practically, it just makes sense: We plan to be awarding Douchebag Decrees for many years to come, and there are some people it would just be easier to mention once, acknowledging that not only have they already amassed an impressive body of douchebaggery, they will surely keep it up for the foreseeable future.

It’s in this spirit that we give a nod today to the lifetime douchechievements of Mrs. Caitlin Flanagan: author, columnist, wife, mother, professional scold, and 24-karat-gold douchebag.

What do sex, creepiness, Beyoncé, The Candyman, and Robert Pattinson have in common (besides making for excellent fanfic)? Why, Bill Condon, of course. The director, best known for his work on Kinsey and Dreamgirls, will direct the fourth installment in the Twilight franchise, Breaking Dawn. Is this a good thing? Let's look at some of his past work and make unfounded predictions! (Come on, you've got nothing better to do at work today than watch Candyman trailers, right?)


Who else but Bill Condon could bring our profoundly disturbing romance to life onscreen?

One of the most thought-provoking movies I saw in 2009 (okay, I didn't see it until 2010) was Up in the Air. Even months later, I'm still not sure whether I actually liked it or if it's the kind of movie that's even meant to be liked. I do credit it with rekindling my love for the word meta and spurring me to pronounce things to be zeitgeisty at the drop of a hat.

I was reminded of Up in the Air the other day when I was pondering the relationship people have to their work, a subject that has come up in conversation (both online and off) a heckuva lot in recent weeks. In the movie, George Clooney's character fires people for a living and, naturally, most of these people don't take the terminations well. In many cases, their reactions betray an anguish and anger that goes beyond a loss of guaranteed income and benefits. Their jobs represented their identity, their self worth, the means by which they defined themselves in the world. Take away the title and what's left?


Photo by Thewmatt

More (rumored) news on the Twilight sequel now that Catherine Hardwicke is no longer the director.  Nikki Finke's got an inside line that Summit has offered Chris Weitz the chance to direct New Moon - and potentially Eclipse, if both films could be made back-to-back.  Weitz is the writer and director of About a Boy, producer and uncredited director of American Pie, and the director for The Golden Compass adaptation.  According to Finke, sources claim that Summit liked the look of The Golden Compass, but the real reason this deal might be in the works is that Weitz is an old buddy of Summit's president of production.  

Do you ever get the feeling that the Hollywood old boy's club is just being replaced with a newer boy's club?

More after the jump... including irrational behavior from a male director!

Looks like I got a little too excited on Friday about the current state of affairs for female directors... By now you've probably heard that Twilight director Catherine Hardwicke has been fired from the blockbuster teen vamp franchise and will not be directing Twilight's sequel New Moon. There's also bad news for Lexi Alexander and Darnell Martin, who had lackluster opening weekends at the box office.

The breakdown after the jump, along with my call for more crappy female directors.