When I adopted my German Shepherd/Husky mix almost four years ago, I—to paraphrase Parks and Recreation's Chris Traeger—lit-rally had no idea what I was in for. Since that fateful day in March 2009, Mariah Carey (named by the shelter for her good looks and vocal range) has shaped my life in many ways. And that's why my 2012 holiday gift guide has the needs of the large-breed dog owner firmly in mind.
Well, Thanksgiving's over and the holiday season has officially begun. No matter what you celebrate this time of year, chances are you're going to need to buy a gift for someone, and that's where our "Bitch in a Box" series comes in! Between now and the end of December, we (Bitch HQ staff and interns) will be taking turns writing themed gift guides designed to please even the scroogiest feminists on your shopping list. To kick things off, here's my guide to gifting for the pet lovers in your life—be sure to add your own suggestions in the comments!
Hey Bitch fans! You know we have a brand new issue out, right? Well, these cats (and dogs) are in the know, and they are so happy they're using the only medium out there that could properly express their animal joy to tell you about it: LOLz.
Ah, the weekend. A time to unwind and have some fun. This particular weekend, I am in New York for my friends' wedding . And you know what the best way to celebrate a wedding (or any special occasion, really) is, don't you? With LOLz, of course!!!
The first special occasion we're celebrating with LOLz this week is Senator Orrin Hatch's abortion amendments were summarily rejected. He wanted to make sure that "abortions could not be covered by any insurance offered through the planned health-insurance exchanges" and that women who wanted their insurance plans to cover abortions would have to buy additional abortion plans. You know, because everyone likes to plan out their abortions years in advance. At any rate, Hatch was shut down, and this puppeh is pretty happy about it:
As you may know, here at Bitch we're also celebrating our new iTunes channel. Subscribe today! These dogs already did, and look how much fun they're having:
Of course, LOLz aren't just good for celebrating special occasions. They are also good for making fun of things you hate. We hate Men's News Daily because they are total a-holes. (For evidence of said a-hole-ishness, check out this article on why feminists are to blame for unfair rape laws. Yikes.) This cat hates Men's News Daily, too:
This season has been unofficially dubbed The Summer of Death, and unfortunately this past week was no exception. As pop culture loving feminists, we are all saddened by the passings of Patrick Swayze, Mary Travers, and Henry Gibson, to name only a few. We all grieve in different ways, to be sure, but a couple of LOL tributez never hurt anybody. In order to ease our collective pain, we bring you the I Can Has Feminizm? R.I.P. Edition.
Simple Minds' "Don't You Forget About Me" could be heard 'round the world this week, commemorating the untimely death of writer/director/producer John Hughes, whose films shaped many a feminist mind during the 1980s (Molly Ringwald was one sassy teen, after all). Well don't worry John Hughes, we won't forget about you, and to prove it, this installment of feminizt LOLz was created in your honor.
If you've got some feminizt LOLz lying around to send us, or if you want to make a few, you can do just that by visiting the I Can Has Cheezburger LOL builder and sending your creations to us here. Now go watch some John Hughes movies, and have a great weekend.
It's the weekend again, and while in some cultures that might mean a well deserved break from work and an afternoon of drinking beer on the porch, here at the Bitch blog it means FEMINIZT LOLz! (You know you love 'em.)
And this bitch has been catcalled dogcalled one too many times this summer:
Have a great weekend, feminizts! And as always, we lovez it wen u makez ur own feminizt lolz. You can do just that by visiting the I Can Has Cheezburger LOL builder and sending your creations to us here. kthxbai!
As you may have seen in Nicole J. Georges' tributes to gay animals, we are learning that gender in the animal kingdom is just as fluid for cats, dogs, giraffes, birds, and monkeys as it is for us humans. Why is it, then, that we still encourage animals (humans included) to conform to antiquated gender roles? Some members of the animal kingdom have had enough of this, like this doggeh who is sick of being dressed like a princess:
And this kitteh is having the opposite problem. Poor lil' guy just wants to dress like a princess!
Here is yet another member of the animal kingdom who is choosing to express her nontraditional gender.
Happy Fourth of July, feminists! To commemorate our nation's independence, here is a reminder that we can all wear our American flags and our feminism on our sleeves when we're out and about today:
You said it, sister. As always, thanks to all of everyone who has been sending us hilarious LOLz! Do you have an idea for a feminizt LOL? Make your own by visiting I Can Has Cheezburger and send 'em to us here. Have a great, firework-and-BBQ-filled weekend, and happy LOL-ing!
Is there a better way to spend a summer weekend than by kicking back with a good book? This week's feminizt LOLz don't think so!
These two kittehs recommend Sisterhood is Powerful by Robin Morgan. An anthology of writings from the women's liberation movement, it's a must-read for any feminist bookworm (bookkitteh?).
When Virgina Woolf said that in order to be creative, women need their own space and income, she might not have been talking about these puppehs directly, but they still think you should readA Room of One's Own.
Yeah, reading about feminist history is fun and all, but some of us like our summer reads a little sexier. This kitteh is enjoying her copy of Betty Dodson's Sex for One, and she thinks you'd like it too!
As always, thanks to all of everyone who has been sending us hilarious LOLz! Do you have an idea for a feminizt LOL? Make your own by visiting I Can Has Cheezburger and send 'em to us here. Have a great, book-filled weekend, and happy LOL-ing!