Sex and the Fat Girl: What's it All About?
Hello, dear Bitch readers. I'm Tasha Fierce and I write the stalled blog Red Vinyl Shoes. If you don't know, I wrote the Size Matters blog series for Bitch last fall. Now I'm back with another column dealing with fat—this time, we're talking about sex and sexuality as it relates to being a fat girl. I feel like talking about sex and fat is something that's rarely done, even though there's so much evidence to support the idea that hey, fat girls like sex too and we're not ashamed of our sexuality. In the media and in life, fat sex is seen as disgusting by many, something that should be hidden away or joked about. I want to celebrate it, break down why there's such a barrier to discussing fat sex and critique the overarching societal values that seek to keep fat girls believing that they can't be sexual beings at the size they're at.
We'll explore topics like fat/BBW porn and discuss whether or not it's exploitative (or just plain hot), "feeders" and how their existence challenges what is conventionally erotic, fat girls and online dating, how certain shapes of fat bodies are considered more sexually attractive, the compartmentalization of fat body parts when it comes to attractiveness, and more. There's a wealth of topics around fat sexuality to explore that haven't really been delved into too much, so I'm aiming to bring them out and examine them with a feminist twist. I'm mainly focusing on fat girls in this series, but we'll be discussing some issues that pertain to the guys too.
As with my last series on fat, with this column I'm not talking about whether or not being fat is healthy or a fun thing to do. I might talk about attractiveness levels, but that's not the space for fat haters to come in and tell me how un-sexy being fat is. NO fat negativity whatsoever, okay? I don't want the comments to descend into bickering again. Let's stay on topic—and this seems like a pretty interesting topic—and if you want to voice your opinion on how disgusting you find fat people, there are plenty of places on the Internet where you can do so and feel supported.
I've actually started a new blog named the same as this column: Sex and the Fat Girl. There I talk more about the frivolous aspects of fat sexuality and also the practical aspects of dating while fat, as well as things like relationships etc. It's got links to some of the articles I've written about sex for other magazines. Red Vinyl Shoes is kind of in limbo, so I'll be updating at the new blog more often. You can also follow me on Twitter as @thefiercestgirl to get updates on what I'm doing and when new posts come up.
Back to the point: I hope you enjoy this column (or at least find it interesting), and I'm looking forward to spending the next two months with you again. I think we'll have fun!
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