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Oh Joy Sex Toy: Navigating Long-Distance Relationships

Each week, artist Erika Moen explores some aspect of sex and reports back on the result for Oh Joy Sex Toy. This week: Erika and her partner Matt discuss long-distance relationships and the ins-and-outs of sexting. 

Read more sex-positive comics by Erika Moen, including one about the internal condom


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Comments

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As someone who is currently

As someone who is currently in an overseas LDR for much of the year, I would HIGHLY recommend FaceTime, Skype, and other free video chat services. I didn't want to drink the iPhone koolaid, but being able to FaceTime for free during my lunch break every day is totally worth the extra money each month. (And if you use FaceTime and Apple messenger on an iPhone, you don't have to pay international calling/texting fees, which are insanely expensive.)

And yes, talk every day! Text constantly! Send cute animal gifs!

Thanks for this!

This is great advice, and I'm proud to say that much of it has already played a major part in the success of my relationship. My boyfriend and I are both full time students (myself in Montreal and him in Toronto) so although the distance isn't huge, our hectic schedules can often get in the way. Luckily, our time zones are the same and we get to Skype goodnight every day, and I can always count on waking up to a sweet message or picture from him.

One thing that I would suggest is to Skype overnight. It's done amazing things for our intimacy...hearing the other person breathe next to you while you sleep is a huge source of comfort and can almost transcend the distance.
Although I miss him tremendously when he's not physically there, it's definitely true that the distance has pushed us to communicate like pro's, because our emotional intimacy is what we're left to focus on. There's something kind of amazing about feeling like you've never been closer to another human being before...without even touching them. One of the major lessons I've gotten to take away is the old familiar, "relationships take work!" THEY DO. It's easy to get lazy about the important stuff when you're distracted by your physical closeness. Our relationship is more rewarding now than it was when we first met (while we were living in the same city). And the weeks we spend together when we can will make for some of the most romantic memories of my life. It can be done, friends! You both just need to want it enough.