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Douchebag Decree: Chick Beer, the "Beer for Women"

"ye olde douchebag decree" in blue letters with a light blue hand-drawn douchebag in the background, and "BITCH HEREBY DECLARES THE FOLLOWING PERSON A TOTAL DOUCHEBAG" in small letters in red underneath.
Are you a woman who secretly enjoys beer yet can't find one girly enough to suit your needs? Would you enjoy beer more if it were pink, low in carbs, and super sweet? Well never fear, because Chick Beer is here! Created by a woman, Chick Beer is designed to appeal to the 25% of the market made up of lady beer drinkers. In theory, marketing a beer to women is a great idea. Many women (myself included) like beer, and most domestic beer ads completely ignore this fact, choosing to market their beer with sexism and homophobia instead (beer! it's for cis men!). In practice, however, Chick Beer takes the stereotype that beer is for men and... reinforces it. By making beer that looks more like the cover of a Shopaholic paperback than, well, beer.
three chick beer bottles in pink and black. Tagline reads: witness the chickness!
Curlz MT: Don't make a product for women without it!

The femmefest doesn't end with pink curly font and a label designed to resemble "the beautiful shape of a woman in a little black dress," either. The beer is low in calories and carbs (because women hate carbs!) and is sweeter than a typical beer (because women don't actually like beer!). According to user reports, the brew itself is actually pink, and the six-packs are designed to make it look "like you are carrying your beer in a hip stylish, purse." Because why carry a six-pack of beer when you could carry a six-pack of beer that looks like a purse?!
a six pack of beer in a black and pink purse design
Oh that's beer? Why I thought you just had a hip, stylish purse!

With a tagline that reads, "Witness the chickness!" and marketing text that declares, "We love Chick Flicks, Chick Lit, and now we can love Chick Beer!! Enjoy!" it's clear that this product is for "chicks." That in itself is annoying (at least to me, a woman who does not identify as a "chick"), but the fact that this is meant to subvert the dominant beer paradigm is what really pushes it over the border into Douchecountry. Feminists and beer-loving (and making) women have been asking for less sexism and more respect when it comes to beer for ages now, and Chick Beer is doing just the opposite. Instead of creating a product that leans on the very bullshit we'd like to forget (women don't like beer because of the taste and the bottle and the fact that it doesn't have anything to do with chick flicks or whatever) I wish the woman behind Chick Beer had created a product with a marketing campaign that respects women as the beer lovers many of us are. We don't need bottles that look like little black dresses, and we don't need pink fizzy lite beer either. Now if you'll excuse me, I, a woman, am off to drink a gender-neutral, beer-tasting beer (gasp!). Care to join?

Previously: Literally Douchey Edition, Ray Wieczorek and the New Hampshire Executive Council

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Comments

18 comments have been made. Post a comment.

This looks like a joke.

This looks like a joke. Geez!

And thank you for nailing them on using one of the top 3 most offensively ugly typefaces.

Oh! Lemme guess! The other

Oh! Lemme guess! The other two are... Comic Sans and Papyrus?

Ding Ding Ding!

You win a case of Chick Beer!

____________
Andi Zeisler, cofounder and editorial/creative director

Comments Policy: Like to hear it? Here it go!

Aww, what's wrong with

Aww, what's wrong with papyrus?

seriously

Not only do I prefer fine whiskey (neat) and action movies (my sweetie just last night held aloft the Rambo box set and said "do you really have the BOX SEX?") but if I was going to drink beer it certainly would not be one that looked like a the complete scrappin' section of Michael's took a dump on the front.

I hate sweet

I hate sweet drinks/cocktails/wine coolers. They make me sick to my stomach--Ew! That's why I drink beer. You know, real beer. I had no idea that my vagina--I mean, my taste buds--were supposed to find that so objectionable!

yuck.

Yes agreed- this is ridiculous. (That font should be ranked among the Comic Sans sort of "NEVER USE, EVER" policy.) I would never feel proud or "more like a chick" buying that beer.
Give me my Miller lite or Corona any day.

but I LIKE sweet

I don't like beer, but maybe I'd like a sweet beer. But certainly not dressed in this graphic design fiasco.

Also, I really don't think my taste (or not) for beer has anything to do with my V. Unless I lost my V for several years while I enjoyed beer, then recently grew a V as I lost my taste for beer? naaahhh

But, then, if I thought of myself as a chick, maybe I would be into a pink purse of beer. But only with a better font. Sheeeeeesh.

beer suggestions.

if you like sweet beers, try the frambozen raspberry brown ale, or lambic fruit beers. pretty good stuff.

Blech!

I guess they like the idea of women being drunk but not the idea of women who actually like alcohol. GOOD alcohol, calories be damned!

So when is someone going to take on Skinny Girl drink mixes? Just because it was created/marketed/whatevered by a woman it doesn't make it any less vile in concept.

a REAL Chick Beer

If you're looking for a real beer that's inspired by the ladies, check out Dieu Du Ciel up in Montreal. Founded by a female, this brewery makes fantastic, inventive and truly unique brews. Everything I've had from them is magical: http://micro.dieuduciel.com/en/who.php

Dieu du Ciel does indeed make

Dieu du Ciel does indeed make lovely beers and is an all-round great company, but I have to say their labels make me cringe. I think it's their "magical" quality. Give me a Maudite any day.

Why are they trying to make everything pink and blue?

Advertisers do it again and again. They create and market products that can be used by both genders specifically to one gender as if both sexes could not enjoy the same thing.

I agree that this isn't helping the feminist cause one bit.

And here are my 2 guesses for the other most annoying fonts: Gigi and Kristin ITC?

Comic sans

I love comic sans - why does everyone hate it?

Sigh, groan, headdesk. If I

Sigh, groan, headdesk.

If I wanted something sweet, pink and fizzy, I'd drink a cherry soda. When I want beer, I want BEER. What's next, bacon for chicks?

Oooh! PINK bacon! Low in fat

Oooh!

PINK bacon!

Low in fat ('cause all proper wimmen diet, donchankow).

Tiny femmy pieces (see above).

I'm imagining a whole oh-so-tasteful advertising campaign based around anorexia and bulemia, played for laughs of course, since nobody can ever get offended if you're joking, as we see so often from Republicans, Tea Partiers, and various assorted douchebags.

Ha ha that was funny, bacon

Ha ha that was funny, bacon for chicks! But definitely would agree with you. If I wanted something sweet, I'd get a cherry soda!

I already consider Guinness

I already consider Guinness to be my favorite beer, but reading about this silly product especially makes me want to go drink a nice thick, black, boiled-bark stout just to thumb my nose at it.