Douchebag Decree: Betty Crocker
As if being a completely fictional model of unobtainable feminine domesticity weren't enough, Betty Crocker has sealed her fate as a Douchebag Decree recipient with the new PMS SOS iPhone app. Ladies, are you PMS-ing? Betty Crocker can help. By giving you coupons for brownies and tips for "crafting an apology." Oh, and there's a version for guys too!
Here's what the new app looks like:
Finally, a way to avoid the drama!
Where to start? First of all, PMS stereotypes are always annoying and they rarely do any women any favors. Just the fact that the guys' version of this thing is called "SOS" says it all (what it says is that women on their periods are out-of-control, irrational, insufferable, and that PMS is worthy of a military-level rescue operation). Sure, PMS is a real thing, but guess what? We women have been making it work for millennia now without any international incidents. PMS jokes are tired, OK Betty Crocker?
Also Betty, the chocolate thing is a little played out. You claim that this app was based on research (women said they craved chocolate while on their periods) but hello! Chocolate is delicious! Men and women like eating it all the time, menses or no menses.
Other things that are bummers about this iPhone app: It pits men and women against each other with dueling iPhone apps (the pistols of our time), it suggests that women must apologize for being on their periods, it paints menstruating women as overly dramatic, it implies that men want to "escape" from their partners (even providing escape routes), it employs every gender stereotype in the book—women like shoes, women will buy anything pink, women are infantile, women cry all the time, men secretly hate women, women secretly hate men, men are clueless, men and women will never get along as long as biology exists—to sell Warm Delights desserts.
These fictional Betty Crockers will stop at nothing to get you to eat brownies. Don't look them in the eyes or you might wake up crying in a pile of Warm Delights! YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.
We may be cranky at the moment but it's this app, not PMS, that is causing our rage. Betty Crocker might suggest shoving some warm brownies in our faces to shut us up (hey, they're what women want!!!), but the tired stereotypes and irritating jokes that are the new Warm Delights PMS SOS iPhone app have left us with no choice but to award Betty Crocker this week's Douchebag Decree.
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