Ugh, you know when you've been hired as an editor at Playboy, a job that is only given to the most talented, intelligent, amazing dudes ever, and they make you write the bios for the stupid Playmates? Like, completely wasting your talent and intelligence and amazingness on some brainless woman who's just a "blank slate with cleavage"? John Blumenthal sure does. Oh, what's that? You don't know who John Blumenthal is? Hmm...that's weird, because according to him he's pretty much the greatest thing ever. But according to us, he's the recipient of this week's Douchebag Decree (highest honor, yet, Johnny, I'm sure). Read more about his painstaking minutes talking to those brick walls with boobs after the jump!
I admit it: I thought the cacophony following the rape charges against NFL star quarterback Ben Roethlisberger was going to be louder. You could say I "Steeler-ed" myself for it, actually. Last summer's charges that Big Ben raped a woman at a Lake Tahoe casino-hotel cued a throwdown that's typical when a high-profile athlete is accused of such a crime--victim-blaming and chest-puffing defenses of Roethlisberger were the least of it. Feminists and others with common sense spoke up loudly when ESPN issued an absurd "do not report" memo to its staff, and when the Lake Tahoe hotel was charged with covering up the rape. Whatever the results of the charges, no one was going to get away with propping up the architecture of rape culture.
I'm going to come out and say something right now, Adam Lambert: I don't get you. I know a lot of people were really excited about you when you were on American Idol. Just the fact that you existed, and were doing well on the show, seemed to be making them happy. And those people usually seemed to be coming from a very sweet, genuine place. I mean, I don't want to reduce you to your sexuality, but: you made a lot of people feel good, apparently, just by accepting your sexuality and not ever really steering away from it and doing a good job on a show that relies on winning over the American public. I'm happy that you made people feel that good. It's a worthwhile pursuit. Good job.
I have no aversion to the romantic comedy format. Show me a quirky heroine, a funny/cocky/cute love interest, a sassy best friend, etc. and I'll generally follow you anywhere. But, while ABC's Cougar Town has all of these things, I just wasn't interested. Why? Because the word "cougar" is in the title.
I've been trying to sit this whole "cougar" thing out since about 2006, but it just won't die. Why does this stupid word live on? The double-standard has been well noted: Men over 40 have been hooking up with younger women for ages, therefore it's sexist to have a derogatory term for women who do the same thing. Maybe the word has staying power precisely because it's been deemed derogatory. Now TV writers are deluding themselves that the word is both funny and controversial. (It's neither.)
We here at Bitch are longtime fans of the Chicago-based feminist sex shop Early to Bed. Imagine our delight, then (and yours too potentially) when we learned of Early to Bed's new brother venture, Early to Rise! (How cute are those two names, by the way? Sex has never been so adorable!)
While Early to Bed caters mainly to the ladies (which is awesome), Early to Rise bills itself as the place to go for "sex toys for smart guys" (which is also awesome). Sex toys they have, to be sure, but they also have so much more!
Full disclosure: I have not actually read anything by YA fiction author Maggie Stiefvater. However, I was tipped off to her existence earlier this week while reading Smart Bitches, Trashy Books and was instantly charmed. Watch this video, in which Stievfater predicts which mythological creature will usurp the vampire in YA romance popularity:
Artsy kids' film Where the Wild Things Are is doing great at the box office, and the soundtrack, written by Yeah Yeah Yeahs' frontwoman Karen O, is one of the best things about the movie (along with all those big hairy monsters with broken hearts)--and you can listen to the whole thing online!
O says "I guess I got involved because of Spike [Jonze, the director], because I guess there is a childlike innocence about my music or my persona or whatever that he always just kind of dialed into." And she's a perfect fit: like the movie, the soundtrack is both raucous and quietly stirring (apropos for recess or for lullabies).
Longtime readers may already know of my love for Gossip Girl's Chuck Bass, and it's only grown since he started being the best boyfriend ever to Blair Waldorf this season. But last night Chuck soared even higher in my heart when he a) kissed a dude and b) was nonplussed as ever.